apartofmoi@Blogspot.com

welcome to my blog. =))) have fun laughing at me if you can. but if you are trying to play a fool, FUCK OFF !!!
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i don't know who =p

Jolynn Chew Wen Yu
Ngee Ann Poly (ECH)
She loves to gossip, but when she doesn't talk, don't force her
She's trying to be nice, don't make her turn nasty
She's not someone you will deem as CHIO, but don't try to put her down
She has very low self-esteem.

friendster acct
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good hair days
good-looking people DUH !!!
japanese food !!!
singing
chilling out (depends on company la)
<3s that him who doesn't love me

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he2 yi2 ge4 bu2 hui4 zhao4 gu4 ni3 gan3 shou4 de4 ren2 zai4 yi4 qi3, ye2 xu3 shi4 yi2 jian4 hao3 shi4 ... yin1 wei4 zhe4 yang4 yi4 lai2, ni3 bu2 hui4 tai4 guo4 yi1 lai4 ta1, bu2 hui4 shi1 qu4 zi4 ji3 ...

dan4 shi4, tong2 shi2 de4, ni3 hui4 gan3 dao4 hen3 ji4 mo4, hao3 xiang4 dou1 mei2 you3 ren2 li3 hui4 ni2, zai4 hu1 ni2 de4 gan3 shou4 ... zhe4 shi4 yin1 wei4, ta1 yi3 jin1 xi2 guan4 mei2 you3 bi4 yao4 zhao4 gu4 ni3 de4 gan3 shou4 de4 shi4 shi2 le4 ... rang4 ta1 xian4 zai4 liao2 jie2 ni3 de4 hua4, you4 hao3 xiang4 hen3 wei2 nan2 ta1 ... yin1 wei4 wo3 de4 xin1 ruan3, rang4 zhe4 duan4 lian4 ai4 na4 me4 de4 xin1 ku3 ...

wo yi3 jin1 ba3 neng2 gou4 gei3 ni2 de4 yi2 qie4 dou1 jiao1 gei3 ni2 le4, dan4 shi4 ni2 neng2 gou4 wei4 wo3 zhao2 xiang3 de4 jiu4 na4 me4 duo1 ma1 ???

sorry to type in han yu pin yin, if this is in english, then it'll lose all its meaning ...

if u haven't notice, i already gave all my efforts ... make the point to go down to somewhere almost everyday, be with you and your friends ... waking up at 5am just to do the homework i did not finish yesterday ... i do this to make u happy, but u want more ... i don't know how much is enough, but nobody has any idea how much of myself have i left ... u enjoy, thinking that it's an entitlement .. but at the same time, have u ever put my feelings into consideration ?? have u ever thought of how much agony i have to put up with by faking a smile when i ain't happy at all ??? have u ever thought that i may be unhappy ?? have u make the effort to understand me ??? or maybe u have never thought of being considerate to me ... i'm sacrificing alot of my future just for u, if that isn't enough, i'm afraid u have to get it somewhere else ...

after all that i've put in, what i get is jealousy ... i tried to pamper u, but never have anyone thought of treating me nicer ... many expect me to trust them, and yet they never showed trust in me ... if u were to get jealous cause of a small thing, then think of how i feel when u did those things ??? think of how i feel when girls flirted with u ... if i can overcome that, then why can't you ??? simply cause u never controlled your feelings just for me ... i need my own stand ...

in life, people need food, shelter and clothes to live ... for example: i have food, shelter, clothes, tv and handphone ... i can give u the two others but now u are eating into my clothes or food or shelter ... i may be able to afford it now, but in no time, u will wipe out everything till it's empty ... i need to take, i really need to ...

i can't take care of your feelings like i used to do, sacrificing studying time just to meet you ... by not meeting you, i'm already hurting your feelings .. i don't know why, but everytime it seems like that ... now i can't compromise that much already, i need my space ... i can't be taking care of your feelings 24hrs anymore, u gotta be strong and not cry because of this anymore ... u have to know the fact that i really can't give anymore, i can't pamper u anymore ... u told me you wanna take care of me, but how ??? if just because i cannot meet u one day out of seven and u get hurt or be sad, then how are u going to take care of me ??? how ...... it's more like i can take care of you ... i want to but i'm really tired ... my world does not evolve around only u, that's the fact, u can't have me to yourself ... because it's my freedom u are talking about ...

hais ... after saying like 67237648972897 words, i still cannot totally express this feeling ... i'm just very tired of taking care of people ... why can't anybody let me take care and do not expect anything in return, i wanna be selfish, but just too soft hearted ... and people take me for granted ... exhausted like i am, i don't know how long more can i give, i feel like i'll let go one day very soon from now ... i dunno how long can i hold out .... i need a considerate person to take care of me ... if it's my time, let it totally be my time ... if not when i'm away, telecommunications continue to flood, then it makes me busier ... if this case, why don't we just meet up ??? save the hassle ...

AIYA !!! I REALLY DUNNO HOW TO CONVEY THIS STUPID FEELING ... GONNA BREAKDOWN IN NO TIME ... I NEED SOME AIR !!!!

XIAOLYNN BANGS THE WALL
i wanna bleed to death so that i'll never have to care anymore

' SHATTERED <3>
7/22/2006 09:53:00 PM